Why do we struggle with making good decisions—even the important ones?
A trainee asked me this recently.
Most people say it’s because of cognitive biases.
But I believe the biggest challenge is simpler—and often overlooked: realising when you’re actually making a decision.
That moment when you don’t even notice you’re deciding? That’s where many mistakes begin.
Sound familiar?
In my old office, important decisions often happened without any real thought.
There were many moments of blind judgment.
I’m convinced more thought went into rock, paper, scissors than some of the decisions I witnessed.
Some decisions worked out, but many didn’t, causing problems for staff and customers alike.
Meanwhile, minor decisions sometimes sparked endless debates and committees, all stemming from a lack of decision-making skills.
The missing piece?
This “meta decision” is straightforward but powerful:
Before you decide what, decide how you will make that choice.
We swiftly pin down what we want:
But rarely do we pause to choose the best way to decide.
The meta decision helps us consider:
It sets boundaries and aligns our approach.
For simple, reversible decisions, quick instinct (System 1) is fine. For complex, hard-to-reverse choices, a slower, more thoughtful process (System 2) is better.
Often, poor decisions stem from confusion or simply not knowing how to decide right.
That’s why the meta decision matters: it invites a brief, thoughtful pause—not a time-consuming break.
Answering a few simple questions brings clarity:
Knowing this reveals important context—like time pressure, why the decision’s needed, and what’s known or unknown.
But none of this helps if you don’t stop and think about the meta decision at all.
So here’s the key: before deciding what, choose how to decide.
Ask yourself better questions to spark better thinking.
One caution: this only works if you recognise when you’re faced with a decision.
If you’re unaware, you risk the issues I described earlier.
You might get lucky sometimes, but who wants to leave decisions to chance?
Start by noticing the decisions you don’t realise you’re making. You might be surprised how many slip by unnoticed.
This small shift can transform how you make every choice.
